Another Check-In / Recommendations

Hello world. Still not up for full time blogging, but I am starting to think "Hmmm I should blog about that" so that's an indication I might be back more regularly soon.

This feels weird to say, because you don't really hear this a lot, but the hubs & I have been having a really good week or two. Sometimes in a marriage (or really any relationship) two people aren't on the same wavelength, and it can be fucking annoying. Right now, we are pretty in sync- mainly due to good communication. That's a super hard thing to get right, but it's felt really good lately. Our church had a very focused sermon a few weeks ago that encouraged a deep talk and while I'm sure it sounds cheesy to some, it was really helpful and sparked a good attitude and increased communication and I'm feeling very happy and comforted. Babycakes went to visit her grandparents this weekend, and we started to make all these big plans for our kid-free weekend. Instead we ended up sitting at our kitchen table talking for three hours. From internet memes to politics to where we were going for dinner, it was just a random old-school conversation with the person I love. It feels very special to have that with my high school sweetheart, my first love, after 16 years together (literally over half my life). He's my fav.

If you haven't watched the Taylor Swift documentary on Netflix, go do it. I've sort of been all over the map regarding my viewpoint on her...as a famous person. I was slowly starting to come back around to the "Hmm she seems kind cool, I actually do like her music surprisingly (not a big pop person), and I could easily see how maybe some things in the media are twisted." This documentary solidified that and put me firmly in the pro-Swift camp. As someone roughly the same age, I've been part of her target audience so to speak, and to see all these things from her point of view from the last 15 years...it was eye-opening. Loved it, can't recommend enough.

My kid's daycare teachers have this sheet of paper outside their door with a list of all the kids who can count to 30. Babycakes was the first kid in her class to do this, which is cool...but also, she's 3. Do we really need to publicly praise/shame a friggin' 3YO? Is it to encourage parents to work on it more at home? It feels icky to me. And my kid is on the list! I can't imagine what it's like to be one of the parents or kids who aren't on the list (not even mentioning special needs kids, which is a whole other topic...). Love the school, glad Babycakes is doing well and learning, but it just feels like an icky aspect of our culture.

I've recommended multiple episodes of The Armchair Expert podcast by Dax Shepherd before, and I'm doing it again. I've read Peggy Orenstien before, and want to read more from her. She's written about culture and media and girls for a long time, and recently wrote a book looking at boys and sex. Hearing her and Dax talk about this is so enlightening and I love this conversation. Listen Here

I'm feeling a bit down and isolated lately...just like my support system isn't there. This could be a chicken-or-egg situation; not sure if I'm down because the lack of support, or if the fact that I'm down makes me feel less connected. I've talked about this before, and maybe it's specific to my certain group of friends, but it seems like a lot of women are just not willing to make friendships a priority.

Along the same line...I skipped my FiA workout this weekend, but I think it was good for me. I spent some time having coffee and reading Buy Yourself the Fucking Lilies (also highly recommend). Between the two, I was inspired and ended up going for a two mile run. I didn't stop or slow down until over a mile in, which is a big deal for me (I can work out, I can ruck, but I usually hate running). I think it was good to feel self-motivated, rather than my group workout which I LOVE and know is good for me but was feeling like a checklist item. Getting out there and reminding myself of why it's good for me and why it matters was mentally healthy for the day.

Oh and I gave up FB for Lent. I never practiced Lent as a child, it's not practiced in all Christian denominations. I've mentioned it before, but the older I get the more I appreciate these religions traditions...not just for traditions sake, but for the purpose behind them (clarity, closer relationship with Christ, etc). At first it was really difficult, because it's my go-to...but after almost a week I realized today that I hadn't even thought of it until I was almost at work- which is a big deal for me. I definitely notice that I still reach for my phone- I've spent more time on Pinterest and Instagram (haven't posted on Instagram in forever before last week). So far the only part I truly miss is having access to the groups for recommendations (places for Hubs & I to go for our date night, insight on fountain pens from my BuJo groups since I'm kicking the idea round of getting one as a greener alternative to my gigantic pen/marker collection). But, I also know I scroll through those groups mindlessly through the day and get annoyed because I see the same questions over and over because it is 2020 and people still don't know the search feature exists. And that aspect isn't good for me. So I think this break will hopefully help me moderate myself better.

1 comment

  1. I was thinking about you yesterday, so I was glad to see you pop up in my Feedly this morning. YAY for being on the same wavelength. I totally get it. When the relationship goes well and it's effortless for it to BE well, I relish it.

    I have a few Orenstien books on my TBR, but I'm plowing through a whole bunch of audiobooks right now before I (finally) cancel my Audible account for a while. I enjoyed the book of hers that I did read a millionty years ago.

    I have a similar isolation feeling, but I think it's semi self-inflicted and semi my people being used to my being in school and just letting me do that. 65 days.

    YAS to people not using the search feature. PREACH. This is the EXACT reason I am in the group for our city's community FB page, but do not follow it because those people are fucking morons and I cannot tolerate the stupidity. It's a feat to stop myself from commenting, "Would you be able to breathe if it wasn't involuntary?" and I know what sorts of chaos that would cause, so I just have to refrain.

    On the running: I'm running the Tarheel Double Down Challenge in Chapel Hill on April 18th. There is a 4 miler and a 10 miler. I'm doing both.. butttt maybe you just need a goal? I feel like a 4 miler would totally be obtainable in a month. Let me know if you need more peer pressure.

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