Rejecting Mom Guilt

There is this prevailing theory in our society today, at least among 99% of mothers I know, that feeling guilty is just part of being a mom.

If you work, if you don't breastfeed, if your child is ever sick or injured, it's inevitable that you- as a mother- are supposed to feel heartbroken and like everything is your fault. You should want to be with your child every second of every day, and you should enjoy every second of every day no matter how hellish the tiny dictator in your house acts.

I see moms feel distraught and they are told "We all feel that way, it's part of the package, best wishes."

And I don't think the women responding this way mean it to be condescending. 

They truly feel like it is just our lot in life as mothers, and they are welcoming another one into the fold of despair. At least we have each other, right?

I've decided that personally, I am going to reject this idea that being a mother means I have to feel like crap all the time. 

Mom guilt can be very real y'all; the mental hell I went through trying to breastfeed was possibly the most stressful time in my life- and I say that as the wife of a combat veteran.

It's real, and it does nothing to make me a better mother/wife/person. In fact, I get sucked down into the abyss and the fail spiral only continues.

Look, I am who I am because of the choices I have made in my life. 

I will not apologize for loving to learn, and for using that education to get a halfway decent job. I will not apologize for getting cabin-fever if I stay in the house for 24 hours straight and desiring (limited) adult interaction. I will not apologize for enjoying my thirty minute child free lunch where I can read in peace. I will not apologize for leaving my child with her father, aka the man I chose as my life partner and father of my child and oh yeah he is not baby-sitting he is BEING A PARENT.

So screw it. I'm saying no to the mom guilt. 

It does nothing but belittle women for no reason.



I refuse. 

Show Is Your Books: October 2016

Alright guys, my computer has decided to crap out...who knows if it's for good or not. Anyway, I'm trying this on my iPad so apologies if this post looks horrible.

My reading streak hasn't been bad, although I did hit a bit if a slump. But I started Delirum last night and I'm hoping that will break it!
This book gave me ALL THE FEELS you guys. It follows a family of women- an Indian woman who gives up a daughter for adoption due to familial/societal pressure, the adoptive white mother, the child, the adoptive grandmother. It discusses love and ethnicity and family and seriously you NEED to read this book right now.

Hidden Bodies by Caroline Kepnes
Ah, Joe. Joe Joe Joe. I still feel bad for how much I sometimes enjoy Joe. He's back in his sarcastic, pervy, self-righteous glory. I enjoyed the East Coast versus West Coast observations (and truly, this book made me happy to be an "Easterner") but gotta say...not sure how I'm feeling about Love. I mean It seems kind of unbelievable..Kepnes has said their will be more Joe in the future so I'm going to need a lot of background on this crazy chick. 


Everland by Wendy Spinale
This is a steam-punk, dystopian version of Peter Pan. It is told from the POV of both Wendy and Captain Hook, and multiple perspectives are usually a sign that I'll like the book. It just gives e book more depth IMO. This was an Audible book and hubs really liked it too.

The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion
I know, I'm soooo late to the game on this one. But it was super cute! Don's way of thinking and reasoning things out was interesting and somewhat adorable. Also the side characters felt very rich- I would totally read about Claudia and Jean on their own.


Naked Heat by Richard Castle 
This is the second book in the Nikki Heat series, and captured my interest more than the first one. I'm not rushing out to get the next one, but if I find it (these were random used bookstore finds) I'd give it a go.

Sorry for the lack of cover pics- technology hates me today.

If you have anything, even 5$, to donate to the relief effort for Hurricane Matthew please do so! 
We are experiencing major flooding here in Eastern ENC and people seem to think that it's fine because the storm has's not. Due to river runoff we are actually expecting things to be the WORST in the next 72 hours as all the water flows into our rivers from the west. This is projected to be the second biggest disaster for the region- second only to Floyd in 1999. Places in SC and GA are even worse. I spent half the day yesterday gathering supplies for evacuees and helping people move- literally dozens of strangers just converging on homes, throwings in bags, and trying to find storage units outside the flood zone. Anything you can spare will be greatly appreciated, I garuntee it.

Life According to Steph